There is a lot of excitement that comes with having a baby…especially if it’s your first.

Everyone in the world will have advice for the new parents and, of course, most of it will be unsolicited. Don’t get me wrong, they all mean well, but at a certain point you start to wonder who is wrong, who is right and who is just plain crazy.

While my wife was pregnant with our first (and only at this point in time), we were told things like, “nausea during pregnancy usually means your having a boy” to “if the baby kicks a lot, then it will be a hyperactive child”. We were also told that my wife craving spicy foods meant

that our child was going to be hairy. Yes, you read that right. Hairy.

It was amazing the types of deductions that came from seemingly sane individuals. And, if we had listened to everyone, we would have expected a hyperactive caveboy to come bursting out of the womb and causing havoc all over the hospital. Not the prettiest of mental images.

Thankfully, we learned to laugh off the weird ones and patiently smile and nod our heads at the others we had already heard a dozen times before. But eventually, someone will say something with such conviction that you are sure they are giving you a line straight from God and you need to just believe it or risk going mute for nine months like John the Baptist’s father. For us, that “God Guess” came from a guy at Home Depot.

We were walking through the store looking for paint or light bulbs or something…it’s not important. Eventually, we were stopped by an employee who looked to be in his late 40’s to early 50’s with tattoos all over his arms and slicked back hair. He was the type of guy you know had some wild stories to his past, but his friendly demeanor and willingness to help conveyed that this one had gone through some transformation.

When he helped us find whatever we were looking for and realized we weren’t there to purchase anything else, he turned his attention to my visibly pregnant wife and asked if this was her first child and a few other basic questions, which I just assumed was his way of being polite. Then, he asked us if we were born again Christians, to which we both replied yes and had a short exchange on the positives of having a relationship with Christ.

After a few minutes of that, he made sure that we did not know the sex of the baby before telling us that we would have a boy and he would be a mighty man of God. He would lead many people to Christ and do great things for the kingdom.

Now, let me make something clear. I was one of the few people that believed we would be having a girl. I had a dream about us having a girl not long after my wife found out we were pregnant and I had maintained that belief without wavering amidst the many people guessing the contrary. But, when this guy laid it out there with such conviction, I started to doubt my previously held belief that we would have a girl. For all I knew, this was a modern day prophet sent by God to deliver the news of this child’s importance to His kingdom. I mean, God could use this guy to give a prophetic word just as easily as He could use Billy Graham, so maybe I should be paying a little bit more attention this one.

Of course, a month later we found out that we were indeed going to have a beautiful little girl, which led me to some interesting post-analysis of our situation with the “Home Depot Gender Prophet”.

  1. Be wary of “prophets” who just whiffed on selling you a washer/dryer unit.
  2. Don’t hesitate to ask if the “prophet” is sure that particular message is for your unborn child and not meant for the pregnant lady checking out the paint samples on aisle 14.
  3. Tattoos are just tattoos. No matter what the design, most people are not “inked” by angels, so don’t just assume they are more spiritually connected than you.
  4. Gender prophets have a 50/50 shot.

In the end, I hope this guy only blew it with the gender part, because the rest would be really cool.

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