My wife is Licensed Professional Counselor Intern (I think I have to legally add the intern part even when referencing her occupational status or she might have her certification revoked). This means that she listens to and analyzes all the things people say, and don’t say, for a living.

Now, much smarter people would probably enjoy having someone like that in their lives. Someone to help them grow and become a better person.

Not me. She has paralyzed my brain.

The crazy thing…she used to make me think I was smarter than her.

“Honey, since I am Mexican, how do you say this phrase in English?” That was cute until I remembered that she was born and raised in Texas.

Now, I have to think through how I present even the most simple statement to her as I know she will use her powers to get into my head and rummage around in there like it is her new, mental playground or something.

Even the most trivial of questions forces me to increasing my processing time well beyond the norm.

How was your day?

Me thinking…

How was my day?

If I say fine she will wonder why it was not bad or great.

If I say great she will probably dig for what made it great. Eventually, I will say that I completed a lot and then she will wonder when I will complete some of the projects here at the house.

If I say bad, she will urge me to explain and I will end up telling her that every second I spend without her is bad. But then, she will either ask me to elaborate on those positive feelings for her or discuss why I feel my “good” days are dependent on us being together.

If I say nothing, she will start to think that I am getting slow and suggest that I see a doctor. If I explain that I am just trying to process through all of the possible responses, she will tell me that behavior isn’t normal and suggest I see a counselor.

So, after quickly evaluating my answer choices, I end up with a solid, one word response…

YES.

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